I Am Now 34....

Robert Brockway robert-5LEc/6Zm6xCUd8a0hrldnti2O/JbrIOy at public.gmane.org
Sun Aug 15 04:28:51 UTC 2010


On Wed, 11 Aug 2010, Michael Lauzon wrote:

> Well, I am now 34 years old, still single after 24 years of trying to
> get a first date, and have not received a birthday present in 20
> years; so not a happy birthday like usual....

Hi Michael.  I'm very sorry to hear that you weren't happy on your 
birthday.

I thought about this before replying.  Several people mentioned the need 
to get out and meet new people.  I absolutely agree.

My recommendation is to challenge yourself.  Go out and try new stuff. 
Join a nature walking group or taking some dancing lessons.  Push your 
boundaries.  This often has positive consequences for humans.

You may find your confidence grows.  You will meet new people.  You 
might become friends with some of them.  Maybe even more.  Maybe.

I've observed that for whatever reason (cultural norms, genetics, 
whatever) there is still an expectation on men to make the 'first move' in 
most cases.  As such a little chutzpah can go a long way.

I have some friends in a situation similar to yours and where they have 
fallen down (IMHO) is in not being assertive at the right moment.  I've 
seen these men get positive signals from women and then seen them blow it 
through inaction.  I'd point this out later and they'd say they knew and 
faltered for some reason.  I always used to point out the same thing: The 
worst she can say is no.

It is never to late to find someone special.  At this stage I think we can 
assume that your strategy up until this point hasn't worked so whatever 
you need to do, it isn't what you have been doing.

Just a few thoughts.  Good luck Michael.

Cheers,

Rob

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