I Am Now 34....

[Christopher Browne]

On Wed, Aug 11, 2010 at 12:15 AM, Michael Lauzon <mlauzon-Re5JQEeQqe8AvxtiuMwx3w at public.gmane.org> wrote:
> Well, I am now 34 years old, still single after 24 years of trying to
> get a first date, and have not received a birthday present in 20
> years; so not a happy birthday like usual....

I can't say I have any greatly useful insights on "first dates;" while
I've had a few of those, and some rather-past-first-dates [indeed, the
last instance of such has been arguably 'stalking' a little bit, with
the happy-to-me aspect that she's moved from being out-of-town to a
particular province afar off that I have reason not to want to revisit
:-)], the successes have never been tied to the perfection of The
First Date.

With anything that's actually *worked*, the "first date" wasn't
something either of us thought was any big deal.  (I could be wrong,
of course; things never got sufficiently world-changing to progress
way onwards.  But I still don't think the NonCapitalization of the
First Date was the root of the problem.)  The harder the pressure you
put on such things, and the more that They're a Big Deal Worthy of
Capitalizing Words, the less likely that there'll be any useful
result.

If you're not happy enough with your birthday *without* The
Relationship, then it's pretty unlikely that it would be terribly
happy with The Relationship.  That fits pretty well with Digimer's
comments; you need to accept yourself as being OK *without* "Her
Validation" before you can be comfortable enough about yourself to be
able to progress in any such direction.

How to go about "accepting yourself as OK" is an enormously personal
matter; I do not remotely know how to determine what that involves for
you.  Presents and First Dates are symbols of deeper things, and
that's where you would explore, if you dare.  It may hurt to do so,
but it's likely to hurt more not to.
-- 
http://linuxfinances.info/info/linuxdistributions.html
--
The Toronto Linux Users Group.      Meetings: http://gtalug.org/
TLUG requests: Linux topics, No HTML, wrap text below 80 columns
How to UNSUBSCRIBE: http://gtalug.org/wiki/Mailing_lists