Hello everyone

[Sy]

Hi guys.. I thought I'd write a story to say hello.


In the beginning, I fell in love with DOS (mostly thanks to 4DOS).  I
BBSed on a 300 baud acoustically-coupled modem on a 286 when people
were debating over the speed differences of a 486 vs the new pentium
60s.  14.4 modems were out back then.  I didn't care.. I didn't even
understand the fashion of colour monitors.

One day I did pick up one of those fancy things, and really liked
being able to underline and colourize my text.  I think I still had a
hercules graphics card and threw it through a funky cga emulator to
play games I'm too embarrased to talk about.

I struggled with Windows 3.0 and never really took to the GUI idea.  I
ended up adopting it because of web access.  I jury-rigged windows
3.11 and lagged behind in the times, resisting the windows 95 fad.  I
agonized at how horrific it was to run real DOS applications in
windows 3.1

I began an archive of windows 3.1 software which never challanged the
DOS collection I had.  I began to collect Windows 95 software.. still
wondering why Microsoft, the inventor of both the DOS I loved and the
Windows I hated couldn't have DOS apps work more happily.

At that time, I had heard of Linux, but I didn't hear enough of it to
be too interested.  At some point, my frustrations with windows 95
caused me to drop everything x86 and pick up a commodore 64.  I
learned to appreciate colour.  And how.

I entered into a struggling c64 scene.. helped dust off a local board
or two and even participated in the last release of a diskmag. (UG
#24)  Very few oldtimers were left, and it was a noticibly declining
scene.  I ended up pulling the plug on the board I adminned, saw the
disbanding of another board I was a cosys of, and saw things fall
apart.

I learned to (slowly) emulate a c64 on a 386.  I cut a custom cable
and learned to hook a 1541 to my PC to transfer software.  It's too
bad my parts and data moved with the owner of one of the boards. 
Whatever.. I let it go.

I came back only to learn that this internet thing had really taken
off.  I still didn't like Windows.  I wondered at how OS/2 managed to
fail in the face of all that.. maybe I should have tried it.  A friend
of mine who was a strong advocate of it ended up turning to Windows..
this was a trend I'd see continue for a while.

I still had old parts, and I was always happy running DOS but unhappy
running Windows.  I think this was when I picked up a book on
Ygdrassil Linux.  I read, and thought, and read.  Only after a lot of
agonizing learning did I figure out that the disk which shipped with
it was damaged.  I ended up getting a huge redhat tome with an install
cd.. and somehow I managed to repeat the same thing.  I read an
agonizing 1/3rd of the book and found that I needed to actually have a
working system to hack around on before I could really comprehend
things.  I tried instaling.. I learned that the installer was busted. 
I gave up.

I went back to Windows.  In my frustration, I nuked my Windows 3.1
archive, something that I still think I ought to regret.  The lure of
the internet had me affixed to Windows 95 and later 98.  I didn't
realise the research tool I had.

Sure, I did the website thing.. a few times from a few angles.  I was
never happy with the technologies I had to deal with.  I guess I'm
never really happy with anything.

I ended up getting frustrated, and thanks to recommendations and some
handholding, I learned enough to dual-boot Slackware.  This is a bit
after their huge version number jump.. this is something I'm still
horrified at.

I don't know how to explain it.  This "Slackware" thing was nothing
like DOS.. and yet there was some familiarity there.  It was obviously
new, and obviously didn't have real users yet.. because there were
issues which would have been fixed in consideration of simple users
like myself.  I learned enough to get X working.  I learned enough to
get Internet access working.  I found the pull of Windows growing
weaker and weaker.

At some point I got fed up with the Windows thing and dumped it..
going entirely Linux.  I didn't care that I was losing a huge amount
of handholding.. I learned to get my machine to SCREAM in comparison
to Windows' whimper.  Blackbox is such a godsend.

Then it started to happen.. applications that I would sweat and bleed
for began to build the foundation of my Linux experience.  Blackbox,
twibright's links, mozilla, centericq, sylpheed, lopster.. aah,
lopster.. the p2p experience had me hooked to Linux the way the
internet originally had me hooked to windows 3.1 and later 95.

I was using Linux enough to begin to understand some of the
undercurrents.. the philosophies driving things.. the culture.  Things
began to bug me.  There were so many issues which were "in theory"
easily fixed by a developer but which were a minor nightmare to users.
 Some issues were such a barrier that I didn't even have the tools to
search for a solution myself -- I just didn't know the terminology. 
Back then, I didn't even think to check into forums, mailing lists,
irc channels or the like.  I have no idea why.

At some point I got back into dual-booting Windows.  I immediately
regretted it.. but the Linux experience had me jaded.  I just wanted
to be coddled by my operating environment.

Time passed.  I hadn't booted into my Linux setup for a while.

At some point I got frustrated again.. and this time I used the
internet as my research tool to learn more about Linux.  With my
frustration at not knowing what I'm doing, or not knowing what tools
were available, back when I was fulltime linux I learned the
foundation of my research skills.  So this time around I knew where to
look.

I researched various distributions.  I tried several of them out.  It
was horrifying.. I know of no other way to describe it.  I grew very
jaded.  I think that at this point I ended up trying NetBSD.. and I
even had the help of a buddy on IRC.  Sure.. I can install it.. but I
was trying to get it working with an alpha of PHP5 for an unusual
setup.  I think it was lunacy of me to go about trying to install a
new OS with a setup I knew nothing about.

And then it happened.. I installed Slackware in my frustration.  And
it worked.  Everything worked.  The install went as-expected.. my
wacked-out setup failed for its own reasons but I muddled through
things.  Everything fell into place.

I was back in love again.  I went through everything all over again..
but this time I had excellent research skills and learned to fix
problems I didn't even know I had.  I found cool apps, and fiddled
with all kinds of stuff.  Sure, I didn't do anything very heavy.. no,
wait.. I did.

Somehow I managed to get an alpha softraid package installed.  I have
no idea how, and my "expert" friend couldn't do it himself.  Somehow
everything started working.  I did the impossible: I got a
video-player to work.  I learned to compile with various options to
make things work in happy ways.

At this time there was still a gap in usability in so many things..
but I had grown enough that I could adapt myself.

It strikes me that Linux is sortof like a free market.. if you are
poor in a free market, it's because you're stupid and lazy (well,
that's how people feel -- that it's somehow only their own fault). 
With Linux.. I began to succeed when I fond motivation and a certain
spark of inspiration and drive.

With all of my best Windows experience.. I could try and try and yet
somehow I never felt like I was getting ahead.  There were fundamental
issues with underpinnings which I couldn't address.

Time passed..

I began to focus more on content and less on learning.. thanks to my
having fallen in love with the wiki concept and having set up my own I
had lots of things to write.

At some point I ended up going back to Windows.  It's like KFC.. after
a while you forget how horrid the stuff is and you are lured by that
smell (well, some people are).  I thought I could pick up some cool
hardware, play some games.. I wanted to play Duke Nukem Whenever and
Doom III.

Starcraft/warcraft had me stick to Windows way back then.. I blew many
hours on it.  But somehow I stopped caring about games.  I missed
games on the c64 and wondered at emulating on this new windows thing. 
I never got around to it.

Actually, I really missed c64 music and demos.  Back when I was using
Slack full-time I picked up a HardSID card and merrily listened to sid
tunes.  Wait.. I remember running sid emulation on windows 3.1.. hrm. 
Well, nevermind then.

Uh, so.. I went with windows full-time.. and bought a shiny new video
card which was state of the art for all of a week..when I learned that
I could have saved $100 by buying through a friend who worked at
Futureshop.  Sigh.

Well, I still like the video card.. I only really used it to watch
some funky windows demos.  Shiny stuff, this 3d nonsense is.

So anyhow.. I puttered around with windows.. grinding my teeth.

For some reason, I imported my entire Linux setup into Windows.. and
abandoned all reason.  I really have no idea why I did that..

I renamed mp3s by hand.. because they wouldn't go on this fancy new
fat32 filesystem I was using.  I can't believe I did that.  Yes, I
looked for solutions in Linux to rename things.. somehow my luck ran
out.. I found some mass renaming tools and such, but nothing really
worked for me.  I ended up hand-renaming hundreds of files.

Well, some time later I learned that a bunch of mp3s were butchered
into short filenames because of Windows' stupid directory length
limitation.  I thought for sure that was solved by fat32 and long
filenames.  I guess not.  Yes, I actually have over a dozen-deep set
of directories with very long filenames.

But I was smart.. as part of my backup scheme, I had a layout of the
mp3 tree including the proper filenames.. and the exact filesizes.

I hand-renamed things by checking the short filename's filesize and
looking it up in that master file.. and then taking that filename and
renaming the short filename back to nearly its original form.  It was
annoying to have to cut down directory names.. but I did what I had
to.

Then it happened.  I accidentally renamed a short filename.  explorer
paused for a good ten seconds or more.  I renamed it to the filesize
which I had been searching for.. and because I was changing the
extension, I was prompted with some nice windows handholding for
permission to remove the extension.

I said no.. I didn't mean to rename it with the filesize.

I looked at the file.  It had changed.

I looked at my reference.. I pasted the filesize from my clipboard.  I
looked at the properties of the short filename.  I gaped.  It was
different.  The filesize was different.

I doublechecked.  Definitely it was different.. I wasn't even doing
anything.. somehow explorer.. shit, the box is compromized.  In the
face of three layers of protection too.  Well, I never really had
faith in security on Windows.

I paused.  I checked with backups.  I have both the original and the
modified file.  I played them both.. since they're both mp3s.. they
both sound ok.  I set things aside for later analysis.

I patiently finished what I was working on.  I put my affairs in order
like a man about to go to war.

FreeBSD?  That didn't do it for me.. I tried and tried.  No, something
doesn't work right.  Debian?  Hell, I didn't want to go anywhere near
that, thanks to my magically blowing it up.

No.. somehow I got Slackware installed.  And it worked.  Without complaint.

So now I'm back.  Now that Linux in general has good forward momentum
there is excellent support for the common hardware, there are a lot of
good resources for my learning the solutions to my own problems, there
are a LOT of excellent applications out there.. and the list of issues
I used to have has dwindled down to nothing.

Heck, it took me under five minutes of researching and adjusting to
get a scroll mouse working with X.. the prospect of which used to
intimidate me.


I think that now I'm finally going to enjoy myself.

I may not be a crusty old dude, and I may not have all the skills
dating back before the term "skillz" was coined (although I do have
some), and I'm not an old hat from back before hard disks (although I
did own an rll and mfm), but I've been through my own personal hell..


Sy,
And so the frog climbed out of the well, and saw the sky for what it truly is.
http://sysy.homeip.net/mw/
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